So Long, Alan

This clip is fascinating by itself, as it confirms every encounter I've had with not only Obama supporters, but also with liberals for the past 20 years. But besides that, it was significant to watch the performance after learning a few days ago that Alan would be exiting Hannity And Colmes in a month or so.

I am not looking at Alan from only his television incarnation of the past 12 years, but from his earlier days of radio syndication from 20 years ago. He is and was a sharp wit on the air, which helped him keep the pacing going throughout his show. "Good radio" we would say.

I remember his usage of a show-ender segment called "radio graffiti", where the call bank was dumped, line by line, with each caller getting only 5 seconds to make their statement, their 'graffiti on the walls', so to speak. That was 20 years ago. In fact, Sean encorporated the same bit in his radio show only after it had been made famous by Alan many years before.

I am a fan of Alan Colmes from a radio professional's perspective, and that includes his punchy, off-putting questions used when he didn't have anything else along the idea of substance and logic to draw from. It worked on radio, because he could always rely on a caller when his own bank was dry, then rail on something else in an incendiary manner. Great radio.

But as we can see, Alan, without his radio props, often comes off as mean-spirited, vengeful, and devoid of substantive questions.

As Alan performs, here, it is obvious that his style wouldn't allow him to take a more holistic angle from which to question Zeigler, but instead goes immediately to the reactionary response of, "Well, so are you", and then "You're calling us bad names". Alan has to make his 2 minutes with the subject, Zeigler, seem a breathless flurry of attacks from what is really fluff.

Sad waste of anything, like, for instance, what a calm, reasoned, more clinical conversation might have allowed. Instead, we are treated to the mud-slinging it usually reduces to, adding nothing to the conversation from the left, other than the sentiment, "You called us stupid".

This is usually the same flacid, inconsequential argument most things of depth and substance break down to when dealing with liberals. Alan just happened to be a little more entertaining about it.

Phil Hears A Different Voice

If you've been a fan of the genius of Phil Hendrie as I have, you know that there is a BIG difference between the Phil of old, vs the Phil of new. It is almost too depressing to get into a recital of all of the things that are different now in Phil's show than what he used to deliver to us, but let me highlight one of them: Phil now is way too angry.

He has been preaching to us for a year, now, about how we needed to look the other way concerning Obama's past associations, how it is time for a new age of American politics, blah, blah, blah. It seemed that he forgot COMPLETELY about the magic talent that convinced legions of us to follow this man to the ends of the dial.

I remember listening to Phil from KFI over the internet in 1998. I had a radio buddy who also loved the Mad Hatter, and I went to the extra trouble to construct a crude recording mechanism for capturing the daily stream of radio comedy: I would use my hand-held voice recorder, sitting in front of my bulky computer speakers, to record this man's brilliance.

This, of course, was before the advent of archived radio shows on third-party servers, or the RIAA's lawsuit, forcing all radio stations to halt their online radio streaming, for fear of being sued by the artist's union for not compensating their voice actors for the increased audiences to which their voices were being broadcast.

Alas, nowadays, one has to patiently put up with DAYS of monologue, diatribe, and preaching to find just one jewel of aural ecstasy from the man. I know, because I catch the feed straight from Talk Radio Network nightly.

It is sad.

It really makes a man clutch his old recordings of Phil in a new way. Snivelling, almost whimpering, I treat these decades-old wav files of Phil as if they were The Arc Of The Covenant. It seems like a different world since Obama got elected last week...and Phil didn't come back.

He has kept up his anger and his preaching, despite getting exactly what he wanted: Obama's election. Like a little child who puts up with a raging father day in and day out, waiting endlessly for the time when ol' Pop will get too drunk to continue his terror, then pass out...I was waiting on Phil.

Hell, I wanted the election over a LONG time before now, but not only out of exhaustion of the mainstream media's fawning over Barry, but because Phil's show was being COMPLETELY monopolized by the issue. I, mistakenly, was thinking that the Old Phil would return to the airwaves after he got what he wanted.

This was not to be so. Dammit.

Without an election to rail about, Phil seems to be fumbling around to find something, anything, to rage about. Now that the air is free of political conflict in a big way, he seems to be hunting in deeper recesses of society for something to remain angry about. Is it the increasing joblessness our nation is facing? No. How about the stock market? No.

Phil is now filling much of his air time each night with: Dr Dobson, of Focus On The Family. See, Phil is a practicing Catholic who hates preachers. He tries to convince the listener that his criticisms of Dobson are bona fide because he attends mass regularly, and therefore tells you and I what the real truth is.

This is all about homosexuality and how Prop 8 failed in California last week. Like the many protestors who pelted the Westwood Mormon churchgoers with epithets and hatred, Phil needs a target to focus his anger on. It isn't the African American or the Latino communities, but it should be. They were the two voting blocs who were largely responsible for passing Prop 8.

Nope, instead, it is a gentle old soul who tries to help those of us who may need a little guidance in life. And not just the kind of guidance suggested by those advocates in the streets, or even Phil himself. Just what else of substance is there to absorb, if not meaningful life lessons from those dedicated to the cloth? Desperate Housewives? American Idol? Howard Stern?

I'm sorry, but the philosophy coming from 99% of the airwaves, be it tv, radio, or even the internet, is vapid and moronic. So many churches have become nothing more than businesses, also. Finding something that speaks to the better angels in us is rare, these days, without being attached to money. Why pick on a radio speaker who is loved by millions, asks nothing of you and I in the way of monthly subscriptions, and speaks from a deep well of care and thoughtfulness?

Well, last night, in day 3 of Phil's [boring] rant against Dr Dobson's induction into the Radio Hall Of Fame, an African American man called in to offer Phil a little insight. Up until now, Phil had been assaulting Dr Dobson for quotes on family instruction that came from the Daily Kos, which obviously hates things like Focus On The Family.

The interaction went something like this:
CALLER: You know, Phil, I've listened to Dr Dobson for 20 years, and if anyone ever got on his program and said that they hated homosexuals, he wouldn't have anything to do with them, and would condemn that kind of thinking immediately.

PHIL: Well...

CALLER: I mean, you don't have to HATE homosexuals to be against Prop 8. Dr Dobson has NEVER said that we should hate anyone, much less homosexuals.

From there, the conversation stuttered along, with Phil trying to pin some specific advice he found "weird" (allowing a young son to shower with dad once to see the male genitalia), on Dr Dobson, which this lifelong listener of Dobson had NEVER heard. It just fizzled out, bringing to the forefront how vacant this presentation of Phil's is these days.

Imus Hosts, Beschloss Faints Over Obama

OR "Barack Obama" OR "Barack Hussein Obama" OR "Senator Barack Obama" OR "Senator Obama" Imus In The Morning, 96.9 WTKK, Boston - Imus in the Morning guest: Michael Beschloss 11/10/08

The way reporters, editors, and columnists have rolled out the red carpet for Obama is already sickening, but how about historians? Aren't they supposed to remain too academic to reveal obvious bias? After all, who could trust their assessment of any president, administration, or history of a people in general?

The way Michael Beschloss goes on here, on Imus' morning radio show, is embarrassing. This man of facts exudes unequivacally that Obama has the highest IQ out of ALL other presidents, etc, etc, yet when Imus asks what it is, Beschloss laughably comes up dry, making a caricature of himself.

George, George, George...

Can you just admit it when you don't know something? Please?

I mean, when I'm listening to you tell us that shadow people exist, that the world is ending soon, and that there's a deep hole in the West somewhere that leaves only gristle and bones when you lower a sheep down into it...I need to feel that you are a truthful person.

The other night this week, a caller was discussing something important to George Noory, like the wonders of a flute-playing robot from Japan (or was it another Bigfoot siting?), when the caller asked George if he ever watched the "Venture Brothers". George stopped for a second, then caught himself with what sounded like a confident, clear, memory of watching the Venture Brothers sometime in the past.

"Yes, yes, I remember watching them. The two cartoon boys from Mike Judge." And he sounded SOOOO certain, and so authoritative, kind of like he does when discussing ALL of the paranormal, metaphysical things he does. Almost smug, in fact.

Well, I'm sorry, George. This time, the Worker In The Light is actually in the dark. The Venture Brothers is a masterpiece of comedy animation that shouldn't be confused with anything else.

Perhaps your age is catching up with you, George, I don't know.

Normally I would cut him some slack, as I know what it's like to run an air shift for 5 hours, always being "on", and sometimes getting a fact wrong in the mix. But this kind of "space cadet" moment of George's seems to be occuring more often, these days. Almost as if he's being distracted by something.

I've heard him tease the audience with the possibility of running for office soon. Is he suddenly placing the Coast To Coast project on the back burner, as he prepares to launch his political career?

Beware of the Larry King syndrome, George: sticking around too long past your time.

Might we see a new host of the weekly C2C emerge soon? I like Ian Punnet, as he seems more modern and content than George. But I also like George Knapp, who hosted last night's show (Sunday into Monday, Jan 19, 2009). Knapp comes across as a somewhat monotone yet engaging speaker.

So Long, Marty; You Left just In Time

If you listen to Hannity's show, you undoubtedly know about Marty. He is a cherished memeber of Sean's audience, and to his credit, Hannity always stops the show's flow to take a call from Marty when he calls in. Marty passed this past week, just before Tuesday's election.

Marty is a WWII veteran who stormed the beaches of Normandy on D-Day. He lived a great life since that tragic day, and like my grandfather, also a WWII-era Army infantry veteran who passed a year ago, I am very inspired and happy that men such as them were able to live full lives after doing for us what they did.

Phil Keeps Selling

I've grown accustomed to hearing less and less of Phil's normal guests in his nightly roundtable, but I wrote it off as Phil taking artistic license with his new syndicator, Talk Radio Network. After all, he was excited to drop the baton he's been running with, known as Supporting George Bush On The Iraq Issue.

Phil can now come back to the fold. He's back home, now, and is interviewing politicians, authors, and more 'authorities' than I've ever heard (except for Jay Santos) him have on, before.

I've heard the zeal in his voice while selling Barack Obama for the better part of a year, and am hearing that same hardsell over the Prop 8 passage. Much talk radio each hour, very little talk radio parody.

Finally, in the second hour of tonight's show, with 20 minutes left, he introduces Vernon, who, at first, took on the persona of Charlie, who used to start off each call with, "You won't talk over me, sir. No sir."

But it was beautiful. Vernon came on to argue against the gay lobby. Phil was getting frustrated with him, and started to press him for specifics. You could here the techno music and nightclub sounds competing with Vernon, who stopped what he was doing to call in to Phil in order to discuss his disgust with the gay lifestyle.

In fact, Vernon was the victim of a gay molester as a young kid.

Eventually, it is discovered that Vernon is making the call from a gay bar, and that he is being ushered in to the club's antechamber room, surrounded by 5 or 6 "alpha males", and is disgusted that this kind of thing goes on.

It lasted for 10 minutes. *sigh*

Then "Dr Greenthumb" takes it to the top of the hour.

I keep hoping that these bits last longer, and that he finally gets back to taking calls while in character. That was the best part of the entire parody--the caller who wasn't in on the joke.

It happened in the final hour, though, to be fair to Phil and his excellent show. A Debra called in to complain about the guest Vernon during the last hour, then Phil stops the call half way through to get Vernon back in the action. It was excellent. Priceless.

That was one of the rare times I've heard one of his characters interact with a real caller. I hope it happens more often.

CNN is Obama Central Reporting

While checking out the numbers on Al Franken's race yesterday, I was unfortunately linked to CNN.com. Check out the ad for their t-shirt:
("Obama inspires historic victory", and "I just saw it on CNN.com, 11:55pm, 11.04.08")

Ted Turner helps to uniform the next brown, er, black shirts.

Election Day After, 2008, On The View

I don't watch the View. But, unfortunately, The View has become a pool from which many are drinking from. At least in the chattering classes. Because some of my favorite AM hosts have cited the outlandish, uninformed, hysterical opinions on The View over the past few years, I have had to digest their soft, airy product, then listen to Whoopi and Barbara brag about how no other tv shows bring you issues "like we do".

Here is a capture from this morning's post-election day discussion:

The Voters Speak

And so it has been done.

Anti-Female Odors From The Left

This great woman has been put through much more hateful, biased, and sexist treatment from the Left than anyone on the Right ever gave to Hillary in the past 16 years:

And yet she STILL draws crowds in the tens of thousands, despite a continual assault on EVERY angle that could be launched: professional, physical, feminism, and motherhood criticisms haven't stopped since McCain chose her back in August.

Attacks like this, from cartoonist Pat Oliphant:

The obvious impressions to me are:

1 How trite and obvious for Oliphant to try to portray the woman as power-hungry and unqualified by having her proclaim to be the "Mayor of Lil ol Wassila", when she is not a mayor, but a wildly popular governor of the largest state in the nation.

2 What cheap instruments--the bats flying around her head--he uses to diminish a woman as out of her wits, a typically-stereotypical male reaction to a strong female.

Of course, the biggest irony is how willing the Left is to portray this self-made feminine hero as a typical, white trash, ditz. The party and philosophy of the Left can't even practice their own credos--why should we?

Tammy Subs For Laura Again

I love listening to Tammy Bruce.

I love her the way I love David Horowitz. Not only are they eloquent, profound, and entertaining to listen to, they are converts. Tammy used to be the head of the Los Angeles chapter of NOW years ago, and found her way out of that feminazi group of brownshirts to sound the alarm loud and clear for all of us who will listen to it.

She's pretty calm about tomorrow, saying that she predicts a McCain win. We'll see. She's broken it down with a wide array of polling data. She is placing high emphasis on how Indiana goes early on. I saw the formula from David Paleologos on Drudge today.

It's interesting:

(Click it for a larger view)

Robo-calls

[Miles Davis, Budo, from Birth Of The Cool]

Rush's show came to an end, and I sighed before it came on. I was half-expecting him to pot down his intro song of Bruce Hornsby's That's Just The Way It Is, in order to come crashing through with impassioned pleading to rally the troops.

"Don't listen to the exit polls tomorrow" he implores. The man I used to call "The Skirt" came on as normal, without screaming over his intro mx, after all.

*sigh*

I was sad to see Rush go. He was as good as ever. The top of the hour local news from WINK/WNOG was full of election-eve buzz, but little else in the way of daily, hard news. It is as if south Florida was not suffering any more murders, home invasions, or canal-diving.

Seems like a while since someone has driven off the hardball to sail right into a
residential canal. We'll see. Maybe we'll get one after the election, here, when people go out to blow off steam, celebrate, or drink heavy like they normally do, while using the new president as a reason for their drunkenness.

It's all good. Nerves are a little fried, it seems. Someone wrote Rush during his show, saying, "Wow, Rush, you actually sound like you're in a good mood!" To which he replied that he was, he always is in a good mood, and there's no reason to feel glum. This election will come and go, the nation will stand, and we'll survive. "Ya' gotta keep the faith" is what he seemed to be saying.

And he's right.

Besides my many reasons for not wanting a President Obama (Supreme Court appointees,
industry-killer, nihilist), there is another, lesser-known reason: Obama would sign a
Fairness Doctrine if it passed through Congress. Can you imagine returning to the pre-1988 days, where all you might get is mind-numbing Larry King on Mutual Radio for your talk radio fix?

[Pharaoh's Dance, Miles Davis, Bitches Brew]

I remember when Jim Bohannon would pinch-hit for Larry on the King's off nights. It was one of those fill-in sessions that first attracted me to Jim. He was arguing with some caller over labor issues, and the caller was a union member. Jim made one clarion statement that still sticks with me: No one owes you a job.

That seemed to disarm the caller. He was previously clamoring on at 100 miles an hour, it seemed, and then Bohannon waits perfectly for the natural break in the caller's ramble, and with his rich, baritone, voice said, "Well, sir, I happen to be of the opinion that nowhere it is written that anyone owes you a job. It is a privelege, sir."

I still have a cassette recording of a show from Mutual Radio that I sent away for from 1989. Larry was interviewing and taking calls with a man from NORML.

So I get through with the top of the hour news, Hannity comes on, and I listen to him tell us that the big prediction he will make about tomorrow is that...he will NOT listen to exit polls!

Wow.

You really went out on a limb with that one, Captain Obvious. Who in the world does he think his audience is? We who listen to the AM band 24 hours a day are not people who are easily taken in, given to wild, emotional swings, ya' know, Sean? You don't need to go on and on about how the exit polls are gonna be wrong. Let not your heart be troubled, Sean, you can talk to us as if we're adults. Give it a try sometime.

I switch off Baby jesus (as Boortz, Royal, and Belinda call him), and switch over to
internet reading. I found an article on Ann Coulter's Get Drunk And Vote For McCain site, written by some communists, screeching and freaking that the "Far Right" were in danger of winning the white house, blah, blah, blah.

The writers were worried that, "The blatant appeals to racism, the coded appeals to ultra-nationalism and militarism, the increased desperation of the ultra-right, the scare tactics they are using and which they will intensify between now and November 4th, the voter suppression campaign and dirty tricks like the vicious robo-calls which have already started, to mention a few."

Yeah, right.

We live in a world where Russia's Left is still poisoning leaders, raiding countries, indiscriminantly killing, and intimidating law-abiding citizens as a regular course of action. Just where can ANY communist look past the atrocities of their making, in order to point a finger of "far" anything at Bush, McCain, or ANYONE on the American Right?

IT CAN'T BE DONE.

There is NO comparrison between the WORST America has ever been in its past, and any of the examples we have in the world of how the Left treated their own
citizens.

[Spanish Key, Miles Davis, Bitches Brew]

And no fair trying to pack the argument with quasi-commie European countries like Norway, Sweeden, Finland, Denmark,Switzerland, etc, as examples of what I'm talking about. If we're the big bad CAPITALIST America, the worst the world has to offer as far as greed and corruption goes, then it is only fair to pick examples of equally-worse examples from the left: U.S.S.R [60-80 million citizens killed during Stalin's reign alone]; Mao Tse Tung [estimates at 50 million people killed during his cultural revolution]; Pol Pot [3 million Cambodians murdered under his regime]

Frankly, there is no comparison. And you think it's obvious to everyone, even the guy next to you.

And yet, when you're thinking like us, like the typical AM radio listener, you're in danger of becoming a hermit. The things you talk about with others has a away of isolating you, and you don't get into a lot of conversations about Pol Pot, Mao, or Stalin. People don't hear these things enough, and the average American consumer out there, the (FM) music-listening person just hears the first two or three sentences out of your mouth, and either their eyes glaze over, or they are reduced to awkward stammering as they try to defend their position.

And so it is with me. I get into enough conversations that I can usually tell if a person can handle a quick reference to The Fall Of Rome or not, and maybe develop into a fun episode from there. I am always impressed by the person who isn't afraid to ask me what something means, as I am that way with everyone. From the child or dullest adults, to the learned doctorate with all of the best answers for whatever his or her science may be, I will many times stop a person with, "You just said this and that. What did you mean?"

I find that hardly anyone stops to ask anymore. They all have the answers, it seems. Some will say that we are in a very polarizing time. I can see that. I know that I am somewhat closed-off from society, so maybe there is some division going on.

For me, as a Libertarian at heart, voting Conservative has always been an off-putting thing for many people my age whom I've encountered. I came back from the war and the people I was surrounded with the most, radio dj's and their girlfriends, they usually acted like they were encountering some sheepherder from the mountains of Nepal, it seemed. They weren't used to someone who had been through my experiences, and came out a diffeent person, slightly.

They were afraid of the warrior side of us, yet always had some of the most cutting words.

[Sanctuary, Miles Davis, Bitches Brew]

"The vicious robo-calls which have already started, to mention a few." I guess I'm lucky. I'm one of those who has only a cell phone as both my home and mobile phone. I won't make the call logs of the "Vicious" robo-calls.

Those pussy communist writers woudn't know vicious if it bit them in their stockings.

Keith Olbermann Parody by Ben Afleck On SNL

It's about time that somebody lampooned this overgrown drama club sissy we know of as Keith Olbermann:

This Just In: Simpsons Parody of Madmen on AMC

Ok, I watch some tv, but not much. One of the shows I've recently begun to catch is Madmen on AMC. Good stuff.

Here's a Youtube link that my girlfriend just sent me to check out: The Simpsons a'la Madmen!

Life With Phil

I remember distinctly where I was when I heard Phil announce that he was retiring from the airwaves in an effort to direct his energies towards tv. It sounded fake to me, because he knows better than all that his brilliance is best served in the medium of radio.

Not tv.

Not that he doesn't do tv well, either. It's just that there's NO way to impersonate Phil's Bobby Dooley as she gloats about the topiary in their front yard made lovingly into a replica of her breasts, a'la Steve, her "wildly successful landscaper" husband.

Despite the flurry of projects he's worked on for tv/film, he was finally given more 3-d exposure in NBC's Teachers, which aired in the winter of 06. The pilot came with 5 more episodes, yet didn't get picked up. It was good, I thought. I wanted it to succeed only because of Phil, and probably judge it with a bias.

However, it was the short-lived series' final show that exposed just how good Phil is for radio. He translated himself on the tv set, going into one of his impersonations as he ducked out of view of the person who was the butt of the stunt. It was cute, but for me, I was less treated to the rich tapestry the radio allows for, compared to seeing Phil duck behind a door in a dark sweater as he 'loses' himself in character.

On radio, when Phil did these "characters", he took the time to set them up. He would talk with them for upwards of 30 minutes, then turning it over to the caller. That's when the brilliance of Phil's art really shines--when the improvisation starts.

And that's how tv, as a medium, sucks for those of us with an attention span a little longer than 3 and a half minutes. Plus, with tv, there's no improvisation. No real chance to fall. Everything is shot, re-shot, triple-shot, etc. Sometimes even in front of a live audience, but still, to us millions of consumers out there, it was scripted and edited for best airing.

Radio isn't like that.

When Phil came back a year later, that's when it became increasingly clear what had taken place: Phil is now with Talk Radio Network, which is a different syndicator than Phil had for many years, Premiere Radio Networks. When you break a contract as a jock in Clear Channel, Cumulus, etc, where one must sign a non-compete contract to get work, then you have to sit out that time period according to the contract.

When I worked for Clear Channel, the non-compete was for 2 years, 200 miles radius from where your voice was heard. Phil was able to negotiate a much better contract than did I or any of my other on-air personnel. He only had to sit out one year.
Now that he's back, a couple of things have changed. He isn't afraid to spend most of the hour pontificating about politics. He was getting more political from 01-06, but it was only for a few minutes that he might praise our troops or openly give sincere credit to President Bush for committing us to the War On Terrorism and the Iraqi War...and then it was back into the next character for the rest of the hour.

Nowadays it mostly monologue, some political guests, and the rarer stop-by's from Chris Putay, Larry Grover, Steve Bosell, RC Collins, Skippy & Frank, Bob Green, Chris Norton, etc.
And the other thing that has changed is that he doesn't take calls during his short bits anymore. That was the deepest of laughs for me every day, listening to my downloaded mp3 on the way to work. Hell, I've sent songs out to Bobby Dooley from Naples who called in for that James Taylor song, sometimes even to Lloyd Bonafide out in Bonita Springs. The joke was broadcast to thousands of people, but shared by only the few who might know these radio characters well.

*sigh*

We see too little of em', Phil.